Sometimes things go well, other times I want to cry!
I've gone through the antiques and mahogany phase of my life. In a large house they look good. In my smaller bungalow they look too heavy and cumbersome; consequently I have gone for lighter woods, oak being the darkest I have now.
So, when it came to selecting the finish for the new (salvaged) oak block flooring in the loft extension, I wanted to keep as near to the original shade as possible. I have a couple of tins of high gloss natural varnish, and a plastic container of water-based clear gloss finish for interior wooden floors.
Since we have two tins of one product, it made sense to use that, so that we wouldn't run out. After about an hour David called me upstairs to look at the result. That's when I wanted to cry!
The floor in the storage area looked almost black!!!! You can see, behind the upright supports in the photo how dark it is, although I must say, it looks a lot less grim than it did when it was wet!
We decided to use the water-based varnish on the main body of the floor, and this has given the look I was expecting - a lovely, warm, golden brown.
I think it looks stunning, and is worth the time and trouble it's taken - David's worked very hard on it, and learned a lot in the process.
The dark area? Well, it's only in the cupboard, I can live with it - it's not as if I'll see much of it, the doors will be closed unless I need something getting out:-)
Soon, we'll be sleeping up there - wow!
Intermittent items from Ashton's Creative Writer, Wheat-free Vegan Cook, Fruit and vegetable grower, Crafter and Card Maker
Showing posts with label loft conversion. Show all posts
Showing posts with label loft conversion. Show all posts
Monday, 21 June 2010
Saturday, 12 June 2010
The loft floor just gets better!
This shot proves that we can clear the floor, more or less - well, it is still work in progress, after all!
The en-suite, however, is a different story! Thank goodness I showed it to you when it was new and shiny:-)
This is what the blocks looked like after their first, rough sanding down. Pretty good when you think they had paint and years of grime on them.
This gorgeous, warm, full-grained solid oak flooring is what we now have upstairs (there's that strange word, upstairs, again!!) Don't you think he's done a good job with the sanding machines?
He's used a belt sander, which I bought a short while ago specifically for this task, and a small, detail sander, one of those shaped a bit like an old flat iron. I think he's done a really good job, and would recommend buying old oak flooring to anyone who doesn't mind a little lot of hard work.
Monday, 31 May 2010
loft conversion update
A brief update on the oak parquet flooring in the loft extension:-
As you can see, it's still a workshop in the loft extension. A veritable hive of industry.
Many of the oak blocks need to be sawn down to size, I was going to leave it to your imagination to picture the dust. But then I thought - "If a picture's worth a thousand words ..." I can sit here, silently, and simply show you!
This is the slanting windowsill below the escape Velux window. This sawdust hasn't heard of gravity!!
This is where the dust is generated - it's a beautiful, rich tawny shade which the camera doesn't do justice.
Although the main body of the floor is laid in a sort of chequed design, we decided to go for a more straightforward layout of blocks under the storage area. I love the simple "brickwork" pattern. The last photo shows where the two areas blend together.
I still love the way the grain shows through, and all the different shades. I'm looking forward to seeing it when it has a protective coating applied, it should really glow then:-)
Monday, 29 March 2010
loft conversion update
It's getting quite exciting,really. The cork underlay has been stuck down with PVA glue to stop it slipping. I bought a couple of rolls of cork, and it's so much thinner and more fragile than the cork tiles I've handled previously! It tears more easily than paper - hence the need for an adhesive. Without any it would have torn to shreds as we walked on it to lay the floor!
The reclaimed oak tiles presented more of a problem than we had anticipated - no surprise there, then! There are about 5 different sizes/thicknesses, not to mention the blocks which were trimmed to fit the factory floor. But we like a challenge, oh yes, we do:-)
Necessity being the mother of invention, so they say, David suggested laying a border of the longest blocks around the patterned area. How sensible! And it looks good, too.
The oak blocks had been painted when they covered the factory floor, so now the really messy part was due. We looked on the internet to see if we could buy a second hand floor sander at a reasonable price, but, as is sometimes the case, nobody was selling just what we wanted at a price that seemed reasonable. So - David decided to try using the hand sanders to see if they would do the trick. We have a couple of belt sanders and also those shaped like an iron, the detail sanders.
The dust!!!!!!!! Oh, the dust! All my lovely magnolia paitwork is begrimed with the stuff, and those ultra expensive Velux windows are shrouded in it. I can't bear to think of how I'm going to clean it all:( Hoovering the floor is easy, but the walls, ceiling and windows, it's not a pretty thought!
But aren't they looking wonderful? Such a warm, glowing shade:-) And, fortunately, the hand sanders are coping with it - though poor David's back would rather it was all over with, I'm sure.
Along the back wall, under the fire-escape window, we're running a bank of simple cupboard doors, which I picked up for 50p each from a bankrupt sale warehouse about three years ago. They're not fixed as yet, but you can see what they will look like - ish! I think they're stunning, but then I would, wouldn't I?
The reclaimed oak tiles presented more of a problem than we had anticipated - no surprise there, then! There are about 5 different sizes/thicknesses, not to mention the blocks which were trimmed to fit the factory floor. But we like a challenge, oh yes, we do:-)
We discussed various styles of laying them; initially I had thought I would have a simple "brickwork" style, nice and simple, I thought. No, not with all the differences it wasn't.
Eventually I decided that a simple block pattern of 3 x 3 would probably be best, so that's what we did. However, there were insufficient blocks in any one size to complete the whole floor area - of course!
The oak blocks had been painted when they covered the factory floor, so now the really messy part was due. We looked on the internet to see if we could buy a second hand floor sander at a reasonable price, but, as is sometimes the case, nobody was selling just what we wanted at a price that seemed reasonable. So - David decided to try using the hand sanders to see if they would do the trick. We have a couple of belt sanders and also those shaped like an iron, the detail sanders.
The dust!!!!!!!! Oh, the dust! All my lovely magnolia paitwork is begrimed with the stuff, and those ultra expensive Velux windows are shrouded in it. I can't bear to think of how I'm going to clean it all:( Hoovering the floor is easy, but the walls, ceiling and windows, it's not a pretty thought!
But aren't they looking wonderful? Such a warm, glowing shade:-) And, fortunately, the hand sanders are coping with it - though poor David's back would rather it was all over with, I'm sure.
Along the back wall, under the fire-escape window, we're running a bank of simple cupboard doors, which I picked up for 50p each from a bankrupt sale warehouse about three years ago. They're not fixed as yet, but you can see what they will look like - ish! I think they're stunning, but then I would, wouldn't I?
Tuesday, 23 February 2010
the flooring is going down in the loft!!
Finally, finally, finally, we have started to lay the flooring in the loft conversion.
You wouldn't believe how difficult it is to know the right way to go about things when you've never done it before!
We ummed and ahhed, as you do, about the best underlay, and finally opted for 2mm thick cork, which I bought on two long rolls.
We smeared PVA glue on the chipboard base, and laid the cork at the weekend. We used the oak blocks as weights to hold it down, as you can see.
Maybe next weekend we'll lay some oak. Who knows?
You wouldn't believe how difficult it is to know the right way to go about things when you've never done it before!
We decided it was better to insulate the remainder of the loft, and board that out before we installed the floor. Seems more sensible than laying and polishing the oak flooring then trailing all the rubbish etc through the room!
So, I bought zillions of rescued oak floor sections on eBay. David has manfully cleared all the bitumen from the backs of them - there really are zillions! He got very black and sticky at times, I'm so lucky to have him to help me:)
We ummed and ahhed, as you do, about the best underlay, and finally opted for 2mm thick cork, which I bought on two long rolls.
We smeared PVA glue on the chipboard base, and laid the cork at the weekend. We used the oak blocks as weights to hold it down, as you can see.
Maybe next weekend we'll lay some oak. Who knows?
Tuesday, 3 November 2009
loft conversion, update, lights
I no longer need to go upstairs (still a new word in my home
vocabulary!) with a lamp afixed to a band round my head like a miner's helmet :-)
vocabulary!) with a lamp afixed to a band round my head like a miner's helmet :-)The lighting system is now up and running, or glowing, I suppose I should say. I chose simple white globes which could accommodate energy efficient bulbs, in keeping with my green outlook, and they look fine.
Did you know that nowadays an electrician will only fit approved lights in a bathroom? Well, he will. Fortunately
the one I had chosen was an approved model, as well as coming complete with its very own energy saving lamp.
Did you know that nowadays an electrician will only fit approved lights in a bathroom? Well, he will. Fortunately
the one I had chosen was an approved model, as well as coming complete with its very own energy saving lamp.The other thing the electrician insisted that he was obliged to fit, was a mains operated smoke alarm. Here it is, adjacent to the globe at the base of the stairs. I hope, that since it is sited here, by the new porch, and thus a whole room and
hallway distant to the kitchen, that its dulcet tones will not be heard too regularly.
hallway distant to the kitchen, that its dulcet tones will not be heard too regularly.I should tell you that when I was growing up, we knew the toast was ready when we heard Mum scraping off the burnt bits over the sink. Even with a toaster she had the capacity to burn bread. Some skills are valuable, that one, alas, was not. Funny thing was that she baked lovely bread, really well. It was just toast that she couldn't manage.
.
The reason for telling you that small historical fact is so that you will understand that when I have toast, I like it to be really well done - it's what I was brought up on. Sadly, smoke alarms tend to believe I'm burning something, they can't appreciate the subtle difference between beautiful dark brown toast, and charcoal. I can.
.
So, I have glowing lights, and a smoke alarm. All working. I have new switches, some of them two way, to illuminate my "upstairs" :-)

.
The grey snake appearing out of the tiles is not, as you might imagine, the trunk of an emaciated elephant, it is the cable which will breathe life into the shower. Maybe tomorrow. We'll see.
I also have ......... - wait for it - ................
radiators! Yes, really, radiators, fastened to the walls, and linked up to the central heating system. Wow! One of them cost me a couple of pounds at a charity auction, a few years ago, the other I bought new at the weekend. Look at how neatly they are fixed,
though! Aren't they neat?? No pipes coming up from the floor, they're new plastic water pipes, of a very small diameter, which enter the rooms through the stud walling. Beautiful - thanks Paul :-)
I also have ......... - wait for it - ................
radiators! Yes, really, radiators, fastened to the walls, and linked up to the central heating system. Wow! One of them cost me a couple of pounds at a charity auction, a few years ago, the other I bought new at the weekend. Look at how neatly they are fixed,
though! Aren't they neat?? No pipes coming up from the floor, they're new plastic water pipes, of a very small diameter, which enter the rooms through the stud walling. Beautiful - thanks Paul :-).
Actually, I think, if you look really hard, you can spot the bathroom radiator coyly appearing in refelection in the mirror, so you didn't really have to wait for it at all, but that would have spoiled the drama somewhat!
It's nearly all over, as far as the workmen are concerned. Rob and Paul, the builders, Kevin, the carpenter, Paul the plumber, and Ian, the electrician have been an integral part of my life for the past three and a half weeks, off and on. They've all been lovely blokes to have around, and I'd have any one of them back to do any extra work that's needed in future.
.
Rob reckoned it would take them four to six weeks, and despite the builing inspector insisting on extras, like the ventilation roof tiles at £7+ each (45 of them, no less! ), things have proceeded well, and they've finished within time. Well, Rob did get Mario (such lovely curly hair, makes me remember insisting my mum cut all mine off when I was about three), in to do the majority of the plastering to save time, but even so, they've done well.
.
This saga is nearly at an end - apart from the painting and oiling I now need to do to decorate it all :-) Talk to me nicely and I might tell you a little about that, too.
Sunday, 1 November 2009
loft conversion update
The plumber arrived in a black mood, his van had packed up and was in having major surgery. Next thing I know my builder comes to me to impart bad news. The plumber said the fittings that came with the new toilet were useless, and water would spray everywhere if he used the connections provided, it needed to go back to the shop.
I bought the loo about four years ago at a car boot sale from a guy who was clearing his warehouse, so it couldn't be returned. I was annoyed because I told the builder at the outset to show the sanitary ware to the plumber, as I didn't know what fixings were included, and that would give him the opportunity to obtain any necessary parts. Clearly that hadn't been done.
I spent hours trawling round looking at toilets, trying to find one without a million little ledges to collect dust.
How many of you can say you enjoy cleaning the outside of your loo? Hold still, I'm having trouble counting. No, I'm joking, none of you has your hand up, do you? And small wonder, I don't know anyone who enjoys the task.
Have you ever looked closely at a toilet pan? Most of them are so badly designed that they have creases and crevices which appear to be quite unnecessary. The more modern, and,
needless to say, expensive, models are much simpler in outline, and relatively easy to keep clean. I really can't justify the expensive models in my tiny en-suite. I haad chosen this model because it is relatively sleek and crevice free, and also a compact size. The cistern is the tall, free-standing section behind the pan. Very neat.
needless to say, expensive, models are much simpler in outline, and relatively easy to keep clean. I really can't justify the expensive models in my tiny en-suite. I haad chosen this model because it is relatively sleek and crevice free, and also a compact size. The cistern is the tall, free-standing section behind the pan. Very neat.David suggested possible ways around the problem, but the plumber was clearly in no mood to listen to an amateur!! So off we went.
Ultimately, David found several designs of flush systems that might fit the existing loo, and we bought a couple of the likeliest for the plumber to look at on his next visit. This was postponed due to his lack of transport. When he did arrive, he was in a better frame of mind, and prepared to consider modifying the existing fittings and sealing with silicone.
The loo is now in situ, and tomorrow the plumber returns and water will flow through the sanitary system. I hope it remains in the system and doesn't end up all over the floor. Keep your fingers crossed for me!!
Tuesday, 27 October 2009
loft conversion, shower room
It's really beginning to look like a shower room! Wow, how fantastic - I'm so glad I got builders in and didn't wait to do-it-ourselves!!When I'd finished tiling the bathroom downstairs (it's a bungalow, remember, so there wasn't an upstairs until now, and it still feels strange to say upstairs and downstairs!!) I had three boxes of large, white bevelled edge wall tiles left over. I'd assum
ed that I'd be able to buy more when the time came to do the shower room. Wrong! They've been discontinued, bother!!
ed that I'd be able to buy more when the time came to do the shower room. Wrong! They've been discontinued, bother!!So, off we went for a trip round the local tile shops - and can't you spend a fortune??? I decided that I would remain cost conscious, and finally found some reasonably sized white tiles at £7.99 a box, and bought the 9 boxes the builder stipu
lated. My eye was caught by some mosaics. Oh dear, they did look sparkly and indulgent. They were. £14 a square foot. But I bought three of them, to inset a two-deep row around the room. It makes such a difference, don't you think?
I bought a three foot high mirror to be included in with the tiles, as it's something I've done before, and I think it's so much safer than a wall-hung mirror. There's no way it can be knocked down if it's grouted in place!! It looks lovely, as you can see.
The plumber is due in a couple of days - how can it be so exciting? I can hardly wait. Watch this space :-)
!!
Tuesday, 20 October 2009
loft conversion, update, progress, Velux fire escape window,
Well, the Velux fire escape window is now happily settle
d in its new home, looking over the south-facing back garden. I just hope that I never have cause to use it, because it's a steep roof overlooking a hard, unforgiving patio area, and I don't much care for heights! I'd probably take my chances on the stairs.
d in its new home, looking over the south-facing back garden. I just hope that I never have cause to use it, because it's a steep roof overlooking a hard, unforgiving patio area, and I don't much care for heights! I'd probably take my chances on the stairs. Talking of which, the stairs now
have a wall either side of them, unplastered, as yet, but walls nonetheless. There'll even be a handrail eventually - but that's jumping the gun slightly!

This shot is from the top of the stairs across the bedroom to the fire escape, I think it'll be lovely when it's finished, but then, I would, wouldn't I?


bought a more sensibly sized 760cm square stoneware one on eBay, which David is collecting for me today. Thankfully, the electrician and plumber are both on holiday this week, so I haven't held them up. Perhaps I'll retain the bright yellow steps as a towel rail. What do you think?
have a wall either side of them, unplastered, as yet, but walls nonetheless. There'll even be a handrail eventually - but that's jumping the gun slightly!
This shot is from the top of the stairs across the bedroom to the fire escape, I think it'll be lovely when it's finished, but then, I would, wouldn't I?

This photo is taken with my back to the fire escape, the shower room is on the left, then the stairs, then the storage area leading to the space above the garage. We'll need to floor that once the builders are gone and we can get on at our own pace.

Here you can see the Velux in the shower room, and the view of tree tops :-) You can see the interesting angles caused by the hip of the roof. This has generated fun and games. The original shower tray I bought was 1200 x 900, with a quadrant at one end. Lovely - yes, but way too big because of the restricted head room! I've
bought a more sensibly sized 760cm square stoneware one on eBay, which David is collecting for me today. Thankfully, the electrician and plumber are both on holiday this week, so I haven't held them up. Perhaps I'll retain the bright yellow steps as a towel rail. What do you think?The plasterer arrived a short while ago. He has such a mop of dark curly hair! He probably hates it, very few of us are content with what nature gave us, are we? But it looks gorgeous - I'm sure he has the girls at his feet, especially following the recent TV series The New Romantics, or whatever it was called.
More another day - bet you can't wait!
Friday, 16 October 2009
short story, dead man in the loft
When the builder told me he had to move a dead man in the loft, I was taken aback, to say the least. I'd been in the loft several times, and nary a corpse had I seen!
Once he'd explained to me what he meant, I decided that therein lay a story for children, and since one of the modules I'm taking this semester at uni is Writing for Children, this was serendipity, indeed.
This is the first draft of the story that evolved from this chance phrase, I hope you'll enjoy the idea, and bear in mind that it is only a first draft!
There’s a Dead Man in Our Loft
The builders arrived yesterday. Two of them, wearing clothes so scruffy Mum wouldn’t let us be seen dead in them! Tufts of grey wire sprout out of the back bit of Frank’s baseball cap. Paul’s bald. I always thought that your hair turned grey then fell out, but Paul’s much younger than Frank. Maybe he’s had chemo-therapy; Dad’s friend Eric’s hair fell out after he’d had chemo, and he was only 30.
Mum’s going to have a baby, and our house is already full! There’s me, I’m Amy, my sister Brenda, and my brother, Chris. And there’s Mum and Dad too. We’ve got three bedrooms, but one’s only tiny. Chris has that one, and I share a bigger one with Brenda. There’s no room for the new baby. He’s a boy, so the scan says, so we’re having the loft converted into a “Master Suite” for Mum and Dad. Chris and baby Danny will have Mum’s old room, when it’s been decorated, of course. They won’t want a room with roses all over the walls!
* * * * * * *
I was deep into my Nancy Drew mystery, when I heard Frank, the builder, asking Mum if he could have a word with her. He was speaking very quietly, and for some reason, whenever I hear people speaking softly, my ears have this habit of trying extra hard to hear what’s being said.
I wish I hadn’t heard what Frank said to Mum, though! I don’t know what to do about it.
‘Mrs Jenkins, could I have a quick word with you? We’ve uncovered a bit of a problem.’
‘Oh dear! What sort of problem? It isn’t going to hold up the building work, is it? The baby’s due in four months, and I really need to have the bedrooms sorted out before he arrives.’
‘It’s nothing we can’t handle, don’t worry. We’ve come across this problem before. There’s a dead man at the far end of the loft needs moving.’
‘What?’ Mum’s voice went quite high, then she sort of laughed, nervously. ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about. There isn’t a dead man in my loft!’
I heard them walk upstairs, so couldn’t hear what they were saying any more. I felt like somebody was squeezing my tummy muscles, and I found I was holding my breath. How could there be a dead man in the loft? Was it like when they found the Princes in the Tower? Had a body been shut up to die in the loft space years ago, when the house was new? Or had a burglar broken in and died up there, starving to death with a broken leg, unable to climb back up the chimney?
My mind played all sorts of little film clips really quickly, trying to make sense of it, but couldn’t. What did it mean? Who could I ask? Should I tell someone, or not? Does it count as a secret? Should I phone the police? I decided I’d tell my best friend, Zoë, about it, and see what she thought. I bet she hasn’t got a corpse in her loft!
* * * * * * *
I was sitting, reading, when somebody else’s hand turned the page for me! It was a hairy, withered-looking hand, with long, yellow nails. My own scream woke me up. The thudding in my chest was so loud I though the house would wake up, but nobody moved. I wish they had woken up, my skin was all goosey, and I was scared. I pulled the duvet over my head, and closed my eyes tightly. I must have gone back to sleep, eventually, because next thing I knew Brenda was opening drawers and cupboards with her usual clatter.
‘Zoë, come over here, I want a quick word with you.’ I stopped, I was speaking like Frank! ‘Zo, quick, I need to talk to you before we go in. Let’s go over there for a minute.’
‘Hi, Amy. What’s up? You look a bit flushed! There’s no need to pull me, I’m coming!’
‘There’s a dead man in our loft! I don’t know what to do.’
‘Don’t be silly, Amy, there can’t be a dead man in the loft. Your whole house would be stinking and full of flies. I’ve seen films where they find bodies, and there’s always big bluebottles, and they use the larvae to see how long the body’s been dead.’
‘But I heard Frank tell Mum. He said they had uncovered a problem, there was a dead man and they had to move it.’
‘You must have misheard him. There can’t be a dead man in your loft. There just can’t. How would he have got there?’
‘Maybe he was burgling the house, fell and broke his neck, and just died. Nobody would look for him in our house, because nobody would have known he was there, would they?’
‘Noooo, no, I suppose that’s possible.’
‘Or maybe he was entombed, like the Pharaoh’s slaves were.’
‘That’s not very likely, is it? Though sometimes when old houses were built they used to put a small animal, or child, in the walls for good luck. But that was in really old houses, and yours is only about 200 years old. And I don’t think they did it with grown men, only children.’
‘The thing is, Zo, what do I do? Should I phone the police? Or will that get Mum and Dad into trouble? Even if I make an anonymous call, I’d have to tell them the address. Then when they come to the house they’ll hear my voice and know it was me sneaking on my parents. So that’s no good.’
‘I don’t think you should do anything yet, the bell’s about to go. Let’s go and line up, we can think about it in class, it’s art first lesson.’
‘You don’t think Dad could have killed anybody, do you? He does get very cross sometimes.’
‘Don’t be daft. Your dad wouldn’t kill anyone. Everyone gets angry sometimes, but we don’t go around killing people!’
The whistle silenced us, but my thoughts were still whirling round like Sher Khan’s eyes in the Jungle Book, making me feel dizzy. We muttered to each other while we painted, but Zoë didn’t know what to do, either. I decided that I would look in the loft when I got home, and see what I could discover before I did anything else.
* * * * * * *
Once I got home, I told Mum I had some homework to do, and went upstairs to my room. I could see Brenda and Chris out in the garden, Mum was in the kitchen, so it was all clear. I crept up the new staircase into the loft on tip-toe. I felt like a crime scene investigator, looking for evidence – I love all the CSI series. The afternoon sun through the new roof window made the loft space look golden, not like a crime scene. I sniffed the air deeply, but couldn’t smell anything rotten. Nor could I see any bluebottles, or any other sort of fly. I couldn’t see any little white maggots wriggling around, either, though I was quite glad about that. I can’t look at the TV screen when they show the maggots, and have to wait until Mum or Dad tells me it’s OK to watch again.
There weren’t any cupboards that might have hidden a body, and the chimney was quite narrow up in the loft, so nobody could have got in there. Where could this dead man have been found? Unless he’d hung himself, but I couldn’t see any hooks in the rafters above my head, just a few dusty spider’s webs, long since abandoned. And Frank said he’d uncovered a problem, but Daddy would have found a man just hanging there when he put the Christmas decorations away each year.
* * * * * * *
‘How’re the builders getting on with the loft, Mum?’ I asked when we were having our pizza, later.
‘Don’t talk with your mouth full, sweetheart, you know it’s rude. They’re getting on alright. They’ll be taking up the old boards and laying the new floor joists tomorrow.’
‘It’s odd having another staircase. The new banisters look really pale, like the ghosts of the other ones. Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to mention ghosts.’
‘Why on earth shouldn’t you mention ghosts? You know there’s no such thing, really.’
‘Well, yes, but after this morning …..’
‘After what, this morning? Did someone say something to you about ghosts at school?’
‘No. Sorry, I heard what Frank said to you. I wasn’t listening, I just heard him.’
‘Heard what, sweetheart? You’re not making much sense.’
‘I heard him tell you about the dead man, Mum. Then you went upstairs, and I didn’t hear any more. Was it a very old man? I’ve been thinking about it all day. Where did they find him? Where is he now? Will there be a post-mortem? Are we in trouble?’
‘Whoa, hold on!’ I couldn’t believe my eyes, Mum was laughing! ‘There isn’t a body in the loft, love, it’s not a real dead man.’
‘But Frank said …’
‘I know, I was confused too! Oh, you poor girl, worrying about dead bodies in the loft all day. Oh dear!’
‘Stop laughing, Mum, stop it!’ I was all mixed up. I was angry because Mum was laughing at me, relieved because there was no dead man, and embarrassed because I’d got something wrong, and, what was worse, told Zoe about it. I could feel my cheeks glowing, and my vision blurred. I sniffed, and stood up quickly to leave the room before anyone noticed.
Mum followed me out.
‘I’m sorry, sweetheart, I wasn’t laughing at you.’
‘Seems like it to me.’
‘No, I was laughing because I’d thought exactly the same as you! Who was he, what was he doing in our loft, how did he die?’
‘Well, it’s not funny.’
‘No, it’s not. Except that it is when you know what Frank was talking about.’
‘Why? What did he mean if he didn’t mean a real dead man, what other sort is there? A live dead man?’
‘No, come up to the loft with me and I’ll show you the dead man.’
‘I’ve been up there. There isn’t one.’
‘Oh, yes there is, come on.’ She took me by the hand and squeezed it. ‘Come on.’
At the top of the stairs Mum pointed to the other side. I couldn’t see anything except a couple of dirty cups next to a pile of bricks.
‘What?’ I asked, still a bit cross.
‘Do you see the bricks over there, like a little wall, under the long piece of wood?’
‘Yes.’
‘Well, that’s what builders call a dead man. A pile of bricks that isn’t actually a wall, it just supports the beam. And the beam supports the roof.’
‘But he said it was a problem.’
‘Yes, it is. He has to take down the bricks and replace them with a huge chunk of wood so that we can have a nice, neat wall across that end, otherwise it would have to have a kink in it. That’s what he meant. Frank had to bring me up to show me, just like I’m showing you, because I’d never heard of it either. So we’ve both learned something new. Now, let’s go and finish that pizza, shall we?’
* * * * * * *
I’m going to have to think very carefully about what I’m going to say to Zoe. Maybe I could pretend I knew all along, and was just teasing her.
Once he'd explained to me what he meant, I decided that therein lay a story for children, and since one of the modules I'm taking this semester at uni is Writing for Children, this was serendipity, indeed.
This is the first draft of the story that evolved from this chance phrase, I hope you'll enjoy the idea, and bear in mind that it is only a first draft!
There’s a Dead Man in Our Loft
The builders arrived yesterday. Two of them, wearing clothes so scruffy Mum wouldn’t let us be seen dead in them! Tufts of grey wire sprout out of the back bit of Frank’s baseball cap. Paul’s bald. I always thought that your hair turned grey then fell out, but Paul’s much younger than Frank. Maybe he’s had chemo-therapy; Dad’s friend Eric’s hair fell out after he’d had chemo, and he was only 30.
Mum’s going to have a baby, and our house is already full! There’s me, I’m Amy, my sister Brenda, and my brother, Chris. And there’s Mum and Dad too. We’ve got three bedrooms, but one’s only tiny. Chris has that one, and I share a bigger one with Brenda. There’s no room for the new baby. He’s a boy, so the scan says, so we’re having the loft converted into a “Master Suite” for Mum and Dad. Chris and baby Danny will have Mum’s old room, when it’s been decorated, of course. They won’t want a room with roses all over the walls!
* * * * * * *
I was deep into my Nancy Drew mystery, when I heard Frank, the builder, asking Mum if he could have a word with her. He was speaking very quietly, and for some reason, whenever I hear people speaking softly, my ears have this habit of trying extra hard to hear what’s being said.
I wish I hadn’t heard what Frank said to Mum, though! I don’t know what to do about it.
‘Mrs Jenkins, could I have a quick word with you? We’ve uncovered a bit of a problem.’
‘Oh dear! What sort of problem? It isn’t going to hold up the building work, is it? The baby’s due in four months, and I really need to have the bedrooms sorted out before he arrives.’
‘It’s nothing we can’t handle, don’t worry. We’ve come across this problem before. There’s a dead man at the far end of the loft needs moving.’
‘What?’ Mum’s voice went quite high, then she sort of laughed, nervously. ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about. There isn’t a dead man in my loft!’
I heard them walk upstairs, so couldn’t hear what they were saying any more. I felt like somebody was squeezing my tummy muscles, and I found I was holding my breath. How could there be a dead man in the loft? Was it like when they found the Princes in the Tower? Had a body been shut up to die in the loft space years ago, when the house was new? Or had a burglar broken in and died up there, starving to death with a broken leg, unable to climb back up the chimney?
My mind played all sorts of little film clips really quickly, trying to make sense of it, but couldn’t. What did it mean? Who could I ask? Should I tell someone, or not? Does it count as a secret? Should I phone the police? I decided I’d tell my best friend, Zoë, about it, and see what she thought. I bet she hasn’t got a corpse in her loft!
* * * * * * *
I was sitting, reading, when somebody else’s hand turned the page for me! It was a hairy, withered-looking hand, with long, yellow nails. My own scream woke me up. The thudding in my chest was so loud I though the house would wake up, but nobody moved. I wish they had woken up, my skin was all goosey, and I was scared. I pulled the duvet over my head, and closed my eyes tightly. I must have gone back to sleep, eventually, because next thing I knew Brenda was opening drawers and cupboards with her usual clatter.
‘Zoë, come over here, I want a quick word with you.’ I stopped, I was speaking like Frank! ‘Zo, quick, I need to talk to you before we go in. Let’s go over there for a minute.’
‘Hi, Amy. What’s up? You look a bit flushed! There’s no need to pull me, I’m coming!’
‘There’s a dead man in our loft! I don’t know what to do.’
‘Don’t be silly, Amy, there can’t be a dead man in the loft. Your whole house would be stinking and full of flies. I’ve seen films where they find bodies, and there’s always big bluebottles, and they use the larvae to see how long the body’s been dead.’
‘But I heard Frank tell Mum. He said they had uncovered a problem, there was a dead man and they had to move it.’
‘You must have misheard him. There can’t be a dead man in your loft. There just can’t. How would he have got there?’
‘Maybe he was burgling the house, fell and broke his neck, and just died. Nobody would look for him in our house, because nobody would have known he was there, would they?’
‘Noooo, no, I suppose that’s possible.’
‘Or maybe he was entombed, like the Pharaoh’s slaves were.’
‘That’s not very likely, is it? Though sometimes when old houses were built they used to put a small animal, or child, in the walls for good luck. But that was in really old houses, and yours is only about 200 years old. And I don’t think they did it with grown men, only children.’
‘The thing is, Zo, what do I do? Should I phone the police? Or will that get Mum and Dad into trouble? Even if I make an anonymous call, I’d have to tell them the address. Then when they come to the house they’ll hear my voice and know it was me sneaking on my parents. So that’s no good.’
‘I don’t think you should do anything yet, the bell’s about to go. Let’s go and line up, we can think about it in class, it’s art first lesson.’
‘You don’t think Dad could have killed anybody, do you? He does get very cross sometimes.’
‘Don’t be daft. Your dad wouldn’t kill anyone. Everyone gets angry sometimes, but we don’t go around killing people!’
The whistle silenced us, but my thoughts were still whirling round like Sher Khan’s eyes in the Jungle Book, making me feel dizzy. We muttered to each other while we painted, but Zoë didn’t know what to do, either. I decided that I would look in the loft when I got home, and see what I could discover before I did anything else.
* * * * * * *
Once I got home, I told Mum I had some homework to do, and went upstairs to my room. I could see Brenda and Chris out in the garden, Mum was in the kitchen, so it was all clear. I crept up the new staircase into the loft on tip-toe. I felt like a crime scene investigator, looking for evidence – I love all the CSI series. The afternoon sun through the new roof window made the loft space look golden, not like a crime scene. I sniffed the air deeply, but couldn’t smell anything rotten. Nor could I see any bluebottles, or any other sort of fly. I couldn’t see any little white maggots wriggling around, either, though I was quite glad about that. I can’t look at the TV screen when they show the maggots, and have to wait until Mum or Dad tells me it’s OK to watch again.
There weren’t any cupboards that might have hidden a body, and the chimney was quite narrow up in the loft, so nobody could have got in there. Where could this dead man have been found? Unless he’d hung himself, but I couldn’t see any hooks in the rafters above my head, just a few dusty spider’s webs, long since abandoned. And Frank said he’d uncovered a problem, but Daddy would have found a man just hanging there when he put the Christmas decorations away each year.
* * * * * * *
‘How’re the builders getting on with the loft, Mum?’ I asked when we were having our pizza, later.
‘Don’t talk with your mouth full, sweetheart, you know it’s rude. They’re getting on alright. They’ll be taking up the old boards and laying the new floor joists tomorrow.’
‘It’s odd having another staircase. The new banisters look really pale, like the ghosts of the other ones. Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to mention ghosts.’
‘Why on earth shouldn’t you mention ghosts? You know there’s no such thing, really.’
‘Well, yes, but after this morning …..’
‘After what, this morning? Did someone say something to you about ghosts at school?’
‘No. Sorry, I heard what Frank said to you. I wasn’t listening, I just heard him.’
‘Heard what, sweetheart? You’re not making much sense.’
‘I heard him tell you about the dead man, Mum. Then you went upstairs, and I didn’t hear any more. Was it a very old man? I’ve been thinking about it all day. Where did they find him? Where is he now? Will there be a post-mortem? Are we in trouble?’
‘Whoa, hold on!’ I couldn’t believe my eyes, Mum was laughing! ‘There isn’t a body in the loft, love, it’s not a real dead man.’
‘But Frank said …’
‘I know, I was confused too! Oh, you poor girl, worrying about dead bodies in the loft all day. Oh dear!’
‘Stop laughing, Mum, stop it!’ I was all mixed up. I was angry because Mum was laughing at me, relieved because there was no dead man, and embarrassed because I’d got something wrong, and, what was worse, told Zoe about it. I could feel my cheeks glowing, and my vision blurred. I sniffed, and stood up quickly to leave the room before anyone noticed.
Mum followed me out.
‘I’m sorry, sweetheart, I wasn’t laughing at you.’
‘Seems like it to me.’
‘No, I was laughing because I’d thought exactly the same as you! Who was he, what was he doing in our loft, how did he die?’
‘Well, it’s not funny.’
‘No, it’s not. Except that it is when you know what Frank was talking about.’
‘Why? What did he mean if he didn’t mean a real dead man, what other sort is there? A live dead man?’
‘No, come up to the loft with me and I’ll show you the dead man.’
‘I’ve been up there. There isn’t one.’
‘Oh, yes there is, come on.’ She took me by the hand and squeezed it. ‘Come on.’
At the top of the stairs Mum pointed to the other side. I couldn’t see anything except a couple of dirty cups next to a pile of bricks.
‘What?’ I asked, still a bit cross.
‘Do you see the bricks over there, like a little wall, under the long piece of wood?’
‘Yes.’
‘Well, that’s what builders call a dead man. A pile of bricks that isn’t actually a wall, it just supports the beam. And the beam supports the roof.’
‘But he said it was a problem.’
‘Yes, it is. He has to take down the bricks and replace them with a huge chunk of wood so that we can have a nice, neat wall across that end, otherwise it would have to have a kink in it. That’s what he meant. Frank had to bring me up to show me, just like I’m showing you, because I’d never heard of it either. So we’ve both learned something new. Now, let’s go and finish that pizza, shall we?’
* * * * * * *
I’m going to have to think very carefully about what I’m going to say to Zoe. Maybe I could pretend I knew all along, and was just teasing her.
loft conversion update
It's two weeks today that the two builders arrived on site, or, in my home, as I
prefer to call it! They have worked hard since their arrival, and a plumber, carpenter and electrician have also appeared, played their parts, then exited, stage left.
The small Velux window in the shower room has been installed, and today the fire escape Velux is being fitted. This really irritates me, having to have a fire escape window fitted. Not only that, but because the window is above the purlin in the loft, I need to have a step fitted so that I can reach easily to step out of the window in the event of a fire. To cap it off, I need a sign fixing to the cupboard in which the step will live, to te
ll me it's there for use in the event of a fire! This is my bedroom, on what is now the first floor, not a hotel room somewhere with countless members of public passing through - or, at least, I hope not!
This is the space where the new Velux will be sited, hence no insulation there. You can see plasterboard visible at the sides, covering up the lovely silver.

The penultimate photo shows the fresh braces across the roof to stabilise it. Seems a shame to cover up such lovely white, clean looking wood, but then I think of the dusting if I kept them all, and there's really no contest. They get covered up :-)
The new side walls cover the supports for the roof trusse
s. These were built of brick, very clumsily, when the bungalow was constructed. They are called "dead men", for some unfathomable reason, which made me think that a story lurked there. (see next post). These brick installations have been removed and replaced with huge chunks of wood, so that the dimensions of the room are slightly greater than they would have been if they had had to block off the originals.
It's all good fun - not clean, but fun :)
prefer to call it! They have worked hard since their arrival, and a plumber, carpenter and electrician have also appeared, played their parts, then exited, stage left.They arrive at about eight every morning, except Sundays, and leave around fourish, having made still more impact every day. You can see here how space-age and silvery the loft looked when the insulation was installed, the silv
er being like the two slices of bread in a conventional sandwich, surrounding a thick layeer of custard, or rock wool.
er being like the two slices of bread in a conventional sandwich, surrounding a thick layeer of custard, or rock wool.It almost seems a pity that all the lovely light reflective surface is then concealed by plasterboard, but I know it's only practical to do it, I'd be forever catching and snagging the fragile foil if it was left there!
The small Velux window in the shower room has been installed, and today the fire escape Velux is being fitted. This really irritates me, having to have a fire escape window fitted. Not only that, but because the window is above the purlin in the loft, I need to have a step fitted so that I can reach easily to step out of the window in the event of a fire. To cap it off, I need a sign fixing to the cupboard in which the step will live, to te
ll me it's there for use in the event of a fire! This is my bedroom, on what is now the first floor, not a hotel room somewhere with countless members of public passing through - or, at least, I hope not!This is the space where the new Velux will be sited, hence no insulation there. You can see plasterboard visible at the sides, covering up the lovely silver.

The penultimate photo shows the fresh braces across the roof to stabilise it. Seems a shame to cover up such lovely white, clean looking wood, but then I think of the dusting if I kept them all, and there's really no contest. They get covered up :-)
The new side walls cover the supports for the roof trusse
s. These were built of brick, very clumsily, when the bungalow was constructed. They are called "dead men", for some unfathomable reason, which made me think that a story lurked there. (see next post). These brick installations have been removed and replaced with huge chunks of wood, so that the dimensions of the room are slightly greater than they would have been if they had had to block off the originals. It's all good fun - not clean, but fun :)
Saturday, 10 October 2009
loft conversion update
My calves keep going into cramp with the unaccustomed exercise of running up and down my lovely new stairs!!! Am I complaining? -Oh, no :) (Well, maybe a little, when it wakes me in the middle of the night, if I have to be completely honest!)
This, believe it or not, is the embrionic shower room :) Sa
dly, the shower tray I bought ages ago, in readiness for this very moment, is too large in proportion to the room and the other sanitary ware, so, more shopping is required. It's hard work, project managing :) fortunately, I bought the shower tray, a lovley, heavy stoneware one, with a shaped end, in a sale, so I'm hoping to sell it on Ebay, or at the local supermarket, and not take too great a loss on it!
This, believe it or not, is the embrionic shower room :) Sa
dly, the shower tray I bought ages ago, in readiness for this very moment, is too large in proportion to the room and the other sanitary ware, so, more shopping is required. It's hard work, project managing :) fortunately, I bought the shower tray, a lovley, heavy stoneware one, with a shaped end, in a sale, so I'm hoping to sell it on Ebay, or at the local supermarket, and not take too great a loss on it!Here you can see that floor-boarding has actually be
en partially laid - a real, solid surface, so that it is no longer necessary to ensure that our weight is over the joists, just to be on the safe side! A fine assortment of tools is also visible - a good indication that the workmen will return, and not disappear to another job:)
en partially laid - a real, solid surface, so that it is no longer necessary to ensure that our weight is over the joists, just to be on the safe side! A fine assortment of tools is also visible - a good indication that the workmen will return, and not disappear to another job:)Sadly, the sky framed by the lovely largish Velux , is overc
ast, but I'm assured that sunshine will be equally visible, someday. The inner frame of the Velux has to be returned, as it's spoiled by what appears to be where a screw is forcing up the wood from below, which is uncceptable in an item that costs over £250.
ast, but I'm assured that sunshine will be equally visible, someday. The inner frame of the Velux has to be returned, as it's spoiled by what appears to be where a screw is forcing up the wood from below, which is uncceptable in an item that costs over £250.Sunday, 4 October 2009
bungalow loft converstion, clutter

When I bought my bungalow about four years ago, one of the first things I did was to hire an architect to draw up plans for a loft conversion to provide a master bedroom and en-suite in the spacious loft.
The plans were approved, and I
paid for builder's instructions to be drawn up, too. Since then, the clutter has become a mountain, as you can see. This has been moved down into what was my bedroom, but will, henceforth, be know as the dining room. Minor clutter has been moved over the garage, where there is head height to stand, but it's not worth including the space in the conversion.
paid for builder's instructions to be drawn up, too. Since then, the clutter has become a mountain, as you can see. This has been moved down into what was my bedroom, but will, henceforth, be know as the dining room. Minor clutter has been moved over the garage, where there is head height to stand, but it's not worth including the space in the conversion.It's a good sized loft, and I've been looking forward to having the work done. Foolish girl!! The builder assured me that
he would phone two weeks before he planned to arrived to commence the work, so that I would have time to clear my precious, and not so precious, belongings out of the way.
he would phone two weeks before he planned to arrived to commence the work, so that I would have time to clear my precious, and not so precious, belongings out of the way.Sadly, this didn't happen, as you knew it wouldn't, didn't you? You were ahead of me! So, at lunchtime on Thursday I took the call that said 'We'll be there at eight in the morning to start the work, alright?'
'Well, not really, no, the loft is full of "stuff", you were supposed to give me a couple of weeks notice before you started.'
'That's not a problem, we'll help you shif the stuff.'
'Well, alright, then, if you don't mind helping to shift the clutter, yes, you can start. See you tomorrow.'
Oh boy!! What you've seen is just some of the clutter. I let my partner know they were arriving next day, and he very kindly drove over to help me to move and stack things up into the love pile you've seen. We were both exhausted.
However, by four o'clock Friday afternoon, I had a staircase
into my loft space!!!! :-) Isn't it lovely? OK., there is a gaping two foot hole at the top where the landing will be, so it's a mite dangerous, but it's there! As I want the tread to be simply varnished, not carpeted, the builder has even gone to the trouble of laying a piece of hardboard over every one of them, and covering the whole lot
with dust sheets. Impressive.
into my loft space!!!! :-) Isn't it lovely? OK., there is a gaping two foot hole at the top where the landing will be, so it's a mite dangerous, but it's there! As I want the tread to be simply varnished, not carpeted, the builder has even gone to the trouble of laying a piece of hardboard over every one of them, and covering the whole lot
with dust sheets. Impressive.The dust sheets are not as pristine looking now as they were when I took the photos, though, believe me! Muddy boots leave a trail, and sawdust and loft insulation. Lovely.
I'll let you know how we progress :-)
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